rules I plan to enact as a parent:
1. there’s no way you’re going to a hotel in the midwest for an internet convention
2. actually, you’re not even allowed to get a tumblr account until you’re old enough to die for this disintegrating country.
And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.
Specifically, Bud Light Lime-a-Rita.
my iPhone alarm displays the text ‘Tap to snooze’ but in my sleepy haze I always read it as ‘Top 10 snooze’ which immediately fills me with pride. ‘if I’m going to avoid starting my day,’ I say to myself, ‘I might as well be one of the best at it.’
you know, in retrospect, maybe i’m not super grateful for american express’ detection of a fraudulent charge on my account from bodybuilding.com.
maybe screw you american express.